Anticipation (Antecipação)

They say that anticipation is half the fun of an experience. Take Christmas for example, the preparations of planning, decorating, making wish lists, shopping, etc., can take months to occur. And the anticipation should be joyful, right? After all is said and done, Christmas is only 1 day: December 25th. But the joy of anticipation and preparations made and the joy that follows should last as long as you want it to last, right? It all depends on your frame of mind, I think.

Not that I take months to prepare for Christmas, and not that the anticipation is always joyful. My life experience has often been that during the month of December I frantically squeeze it all in with some semblance of the Christmas spirit. I don't think I've yet learned how to ENJOY Christmas the way it could be enjoyed. I suppose there are all kinds of excuses for my lack of "proper antecipação" of Christmas. I just haven't figured it all out yet. Maybe someday I will. I keep trying. I think that being a child may be the key. If I could turn back the clock and become a child again...

Anyway, back to the idea of "antecipação". For the last 5 months, (no, wait) it's been years, that we've been anticipating what will occur in 2 weeks. I remember listening to general conference talks with our children gathered around, in which we were encouraged to plan and prepare for the day when, as "Seniors", we could serve a mission. What a wonderful experience that would be. Ed and I looked at each other and agreed that was what we wanted to do, were going to do, when the time came, if our children ever grew up.

Near the end of 2008 we decided that the time was right. We would put everything in order and make it happen in 2009. Then we were called into the Stake President's office and were called on a part-time mission for a year to serve as teachers at Deseret Industries. We wondered at that, but thought it would be good preparation for full-time service. It was really fun developing and team-teaching a 6 week course in personal finance to associates of the DI. But during that time we were still planning for full-time service, only now it would have to be in 2010.

We were told if we were willing to serve anywhere in the world that we should put our application in 6 months before our availability date. So obediently, we made it happen. Our papers were submitted June 29th.

Four weeks from the day our mission application was submitted we received our mission call. Ed left early that day to take the car to the car wash. The post office was just down the block from the car wash and it occurred to him that the mail may not have left the office yet, so he went over and asked if our mail was still there and if he could pick it up. Where else, but in Utah, could this happen: after seeing that large white envelope from Church headquarters, the man said “so your son’s mission call has arrived.” Ed corrected him: “No, it’s our call”.

We were excited to receive the call, to be going to Brazil. Brazil Recife Mission to be exact. But we were not to report to the MTC until Jan. 4th. It was so far away that it didn't seem real. We set up a schedule right away with a tutor at the MTC to learn Portuguese twice a week and have been faithfully studying and practicing ever since. Our tutor is a girl from São Paulo and has been so helpful.

Back to "antecipação". The learning of Portuguese has not been easy. This brain of mine has never been so well-used. Anticipating each tutoring session is never "joyful" but it is so necessary, and therefore faced with determination. All the time I have to remind myself of the value of what we are doing. I listen as Ed works with the tutor (his hour is pretty much all spoken in Portuguese) and am tempted to think I'll never get that good. I marvel that he learned it on his first mission at the age of 19 without the benefit of any prior training.

Now, with three weeks to go, my antecipação is building to the point that I wish we had reported to the MTC back in August or September! I'm sometimes scared, sometimes anxious, always excited to the point that my emotions spill over in tears when I least expect it. I'll be glad to be actually doing it instead of anticipating. I'm tired of the anticipation! Let's go! The bishopric has not yet said anything about the usual "farewell" talk in our ward. We're keeping a low profile there thinking maybe they'll forget. (That's not a very missionary kind of attitude, is it.) Oh well, it's a good thing that being perfect is not a prerequisite for missionary work. I'd never be allowed to serve.

When we started this blog I promised myself to never write epistles. Each entry would be short and succinct. I never "anticipated" having so much to say. hmmmm